Receiving Love: Transform Your Relationship by Letting Yourself Be Loved

"This groundbreaking book from the best-selling authors of Getting the Love You Want and coauthors of Giving the Love that Heals is the first to address the biggest unexplored issue facing couples today: Most of us are better at giving love than accepting it. We don't realize all the ways that our resistance to appreciation, praise, compliments, and accepting help from others hurts us and cripples our relationships. Many partners learn how to give love, but many more undermine their relationships by for-getting something that is equally important -- learning to receive it. According to the authors, the root of the problem is the self-rejection that began in childhood, when our parents and caretakers unintentionally failed to nurture or directly rejected traits, characteristics, or im-pulses when we were children. We end up rejecting in ourselves whatever our caretakers ignored or rejected in the course of our childhoods. When we become adults, this makes it impossible to let in the love we want and need, even when our partners offer it. As a result, we dismiss compliments, minimize gestures of affection, and create obstacles to true intimacy. In this book, Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt, co-creators of Imago Relation-ship Therapy, offer a definitive guide to breaking the shackles of self-rejection and embracing the love our partners offer. Receiving Love is a very personal book for Drs. Hendrix and Hunt, and much of their own journey is the inspiration for it. Drawing on their renowned expertise, the wide clinical experience of hundreds of Imago therapists, and their own personal experience, the authors are able to offer detailed guidance on how to conquer the problems that come from self-rejection and embrace the gifts that are abundant in every person's life, if only we knew how to accept them. With its groundbreaking theory, challenging processes, and inspiring examples, this book holds the key to loving relationships that last. "

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Title of ebook: Receiving Love: Transform Your Relationship by Letting Yourself Be Loved
ISBN: 9781416507642
parent-ISBN: 9780743483698
Publisher: Atria Books
Published: 10-2004
Released online for download: 10-05-2004
Author of eBook: Hendrix, Harville
Author of eBook: Hunt, Helen

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Receiving Love

Letting Yourself Be Loved Will Transform Your Relationship

Chapter 1: Nothing's Ever Good Enough

You're never happy with anything I do. I feel like giving up.

When it comes to love relationships, things are often not what they seem. The common wisdom is that romantic relationships would stay happy if people did a better job of giving to each other. But that's not what we've discovered. We've found that many people need to do a better job of receiving the gifts their partners are already offering. It's surprising how often the compliments, appreciations, and encouragements of a well-intentioned partner make no dent in the armor of an unhappy partner. The compliments are brushed off, the votes of confidence are discounted, and the words of encouragement fall on deaf ears. Why does this happen? And why does this universal but unexplored quirk of human nature carry with it implications for the health of marriage as an institution and the quality of our lives in community with others?

Let's begin with the couple who first inspired our odyssey into the hidden complications o ... read full excerpt from: Receiving Love: Transform Your Relationship by Letting Yourself Be Loved ebook

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