Chapter One

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THE CONCERNED CELEBRITY

Celebrities on the World Around Us

Celebrities are like superheroes—they are powerful beings who can use their special skills for good. Or evil, for that matter.

So let us take a look at how celebrities use their power on the world stage.

Celebrities Solve All the World’s Problems, Part 1

It is terribly easy—and terribly unfair—to dismiss celebrities as mere pretty faces. These people are thinkers and carers and doers. Like so many of us, they worry about the world of today, about the pressing problems we face. And, as so-called “creatives,” they are chock-full of extremely creative (not to mention innovative) suggestions on how to solve these problems. We are shocked, shocked, that no one has ever acted upon these ideas.

Let us take a look, then, at some of the most pressing problems existing in the 21st century—and the solutions proposed by various celebrities.

World Problem #1: Terrorism

Celebrity Solution: Put “all the mean people” in a special terrorist country

Tara Reid is one helluva prognosticator. In fact, we wonder why she has never been a talking head on CNN. (Open note to CNN: Sign this gal up!) After the London terrorist subway bombings, she came up with a sage idea on how to prevent further terrorism:

“I wish all the mean people, if you want to be mean to each other, just buy a country together and blow each other up. Then we’d have no terrorists left. Like, don’t kill innocent people for no reason. It’s not fair. We love everybody. We’d even like them if they said they’re sorry. It