The college admissions process is:
A) Similar to gallbladder surgery without anesthesia
B) Worse than watching American Idol auditions without earplugs
C) Soul-destroying, ego-crushing, and life-sucking
D) Actually kind of funny when you think about it
E) All of the above
There’s no denying it: Applying to college is a grueling journey just shy of cruel and unusual punishment. But that doesn’t mean you can’t laugh along the way. If college is on your horizon, Don’t Stalk the Admissions Officer shows you how to ace the tricky application process—while maintaining your sense of humor and sanity. Former pre-admissions counselor Risa Lewak empowers you to craft a killer essay, choose between the SAT and ACT, score stellar recommendations, nail the interview, handle overly involved parents, and more. You’ll also learn how to navigate crucial post-application issues, like financial aid, rejection, and deciding whether to take a year off. Packed with insider tips, helpful suggestions, and laugh-out-loud anecdotes, this savvy handbook gives you the know-how and confidence to conquer this stressful rite of passage . . . and minimize nervous breakdowns.
From the Trade Paperback edition.
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|Title of eBook: Don't Stalk the Admissions Officer|
|Release Date: 07-13-2010|
|Allowed Countries (hover)|
|Publisher: Ten Speed Press|
This eBook download is available in the following formats:
|Parent title||Don't Stalk the...|
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Don't Stalk the Admissions Officer
The following question won’t affect your GPA:
Q: Who’s happier: the overdriven, AP-inundated American high school student, or the Dayak teenager from Borneo who throws rocks at his own head during initiation rites?
A) It depends on where the Borneo kid is applying.
B) Is rock throwing weighted?
C) Ask me after November 1st.
D) What’s wrong with throwing rocks at yourself?
If you answered A, then you need to chill out about the application process because you’re a wee bit paranoid about your competition. If you answered B, then check with your guidance counselor, because chances are rock throwing is not offered as a course. If you answered C, then you’re probably locked in your room right now calculating how many more points you need to raise your SAT score to get in early decision. If you answered D, then your parents should take you in for psychological testing.
You’ve spent too many nights praying that colleges will think that the summer you fed Cocoapuffs to Buddhist monks will compensate for the 0.00005839 drop in your GPA after AP Physics junior year. Your social life has gotten so bad that you’re thinking about asking your SAT tutor to the prom. You can’t even have normal fantasies anymore—your guidance counselor keeps showing up in a black leather bathing suit, gently rubbing your transcript with hot oil.
“Who are you, anyway?” you’re asking. “I have a calculus exam tomorrow.” Before you go back to Multivariable Calcul...